Just yesterday, my daughter received the news: She needed glasses. Because she’s going into the 7th grade, she was a bundle of both excitement and hesitation with the announcement…. but mainly excitement… and I believe it’s because there is something in ALL of us dying to be different. Different than who we were yesterday and different than all of those around us. For far too many, the fear of being too different will keep them in that swamp of sameness I’ve referred to before. I hope that’s not you, because for business owners, it truly is Differentiate or DIE. But how?
I’ve done a lot over this past year. I’ve traveled all over, navigated the turbulent (and almost fictitious) waters of work / life balance and almost drowned, had many personal and professional challenges to overcome, and had some huge, exciting wins as well. Had I done anything that would have, could have or should have lumped me into the “business coaching as usual” cesspool, I assure you that none of this would have been possible. Me being, doing, selling, networking, positioning, speaking and marketing differently made it possible.
I’ve narrowed down four specific ways you MUST Differentiate YOUR business – whether you do websites, take pictures, sell cars, coach, consult, or heal – if you are going to make massive and measurable gains in income and influence. I encourage you to think about them, write down each category and ask – for each, “How am I measurably, definitively, and undeniably different?”
1.) Bedside Manner. Bedside manner isn’t just for physicians, and you’d be wise to ask the question, “What is MY bedside manner?” In what way are people treated when they enter your business, meet with you, or hear you speak? Are you reassuring? Bubbly? Stern? Harsh? Compassionate? Funny? Challenging? Encouraging? Serious? Entertaining?
I recently saw a bunch of pictures of me speaking and realized how very different I am than most “conference speakers”. I look like such a downer. =) “They” are so bubbly, animated, fun… and I’m more serious, focused, intent. I’m certainly not saying that “they” are wrong and “I” am right, or vice versa. I’m merely pointing out a very noticeable difference… one that definitely sets me apart from others in my industry. I’ll never be paid to entertain or inspire or pump people up. I’m simply not that speaker. Similarly, there are health or weight loss coaches who get paid to deliver harsh, boot camp like support and others who are far more nurturing. Neither is right or wrong… just different. How is YOUR bedside manner different than others in your industry?
2.) Results. How are your results different than others in your industry? Do you know what results you’re after? Do you know what you hope your clients or customers will experience as a result of your product or services? In every business, you’ll want to very clearly call attention to how the results your clients see is different than what is typical or what is experienced by a competitive product or service.
3.) Uncensored Authenticity. Are you positioning and posturing your way through each day… Or are you being authentic? Do you DARE to be FEARLESSLY, AUTHENTICALLY you? To bring ALL of yourself to your business? Infusing your business with a heavy dose of authenticity is a guaranteed way to stand out in even the most over-crowded of marketplaces. How can your business, your products, your presence, your website, your social media efforts, your office space be more “YOU”? How can you HONOR yourself as part of whatever success plan you’re following?
4. Low Tolerance. Now, my Mom will cringe at this one. As she points out, you tend to get more “intolerant” with age, and I’ve demonstrated a scarily low interest in tolerance for some time now. But, what are YOU intolerant of? This is actually a very clever way to differentiate yourself. I have a low (or NO) tolerance for all of the following: excuses, pettiness, jealousy, beating around the bush, people who don’t actually WANT to work, liars, passive aggressive behaviors and disloyalty. (This is actually my short list, because I do have to demonstrate SOME level of restraint on this blog… lol…) These “intolerances” help set me apart from any and all possible competitors, because I’m quite bold with them. What are YOU intolerant of? What about your store? Your business? What will you simply NOT tolerate? Allow YOUR OWN short list of low tolerance to begin to set you apart!
Wanna share? Maybe you want to disclose your own “LOW TOLERANCE” list…. or maybe you have set yourself apart in some great, fabulous and fun way. Whatever’s on your mind, I want to hear it! Post a comment below!
OUTSTANDING article Michelle – that has to be one of your best yet! My favorite is number 4 – too many of us woman in business take it all – even if we dont like it – and that frankly will exhaust you! thanks for the four things I will be thinking about over the weekend!!! take care, Janet
Janet! Great to hear from you!!! Thanks for weighing in! =)
Loved the post! This was excatly what I needed this morning. Had a bad day yesterday – talked with a possible client about all the things I could do for them to set up a training program for them from scratch. They loved my background, I was definitely qualified. We then started making buisness plans – how, why, when, what of setting up a training program. Wrote down all kinds of first steps. All went well (I thought). Well, I get a call later in the afternoon from their HR – with the information I gave them they have decided they need a Director of Training not a consultant. I then asked if I was still part of the plans to guide them. Nope, they said the new Director they would hire could do that but thanks for the great ideas! I was floored! Your post just reminded me of my low tolerance of people and companies in my past that use everyone’s ideas and don’t give credit back. Ugh! Thanks for being their for me this morning Michelle. I can move past this now. Have a wonderful weekend!
Great article- you are who you are (which is awesome by the way) and are not swayed by other people’s expectations. That is so rare.
I thought I would share my greatest intolerances which are “fit-pitching without sufficient provocation,” and “over-estimation of self-importance.”
Thanks- wendy
Authenticity is KEY! I focus on celebrating the uniqueness that God blessed me with (everyone has a uniqueness) and base my everyday decisions on honoring this! I encourage and passionately promote authenticity with every human being I encounter…it is my gift back to Him! You are a true treasure Michelle!
Thanks Jenn Lee!! I love this!
Michelle, I really enjoyed your article on being different. While variations of the first three are fairly standard dimensions of being different, I thought point 4 “low tolerance” was a very interesting twist.
I guess it also suits my “grumpy old man” personality as it give me a chance to rant.
Paul, I’d love to hear more about your grumpy old man NO TOLERANCE list! lol… =)
Michelle owns the differentiation space, not just because of those 4 tenets but because she WALKS THE TALK! That and only that is the key differentiator in work and in life. I’m Michelle’s biggest fan and the poster child for how she brings it all to bear!!!!
Thanks Dani!!! xoxo
Wow!!…That was simply great…agree with all the 4…now have to identify and work on mine….Thank you
Hey Michelle –
Like everyone else, I too was struck by your low tolerance idea – but it’s the “Bedside Manner” one that got me. Just yesterday I got a call from a former client who came to me for help with anxiety and depression, most of which – in the end – stemmed from the many ways she was NOT being true to herself. Through our work, she rediscovered and rededicated herself to her first love – writing. Only a year later she’s become a top seller in her market on Amazon, and had called to share her excitement and incredible success. As we talked, she said “It was your encouragement that made this possible…” And I know that there’s truth in that. I am a radical encourager, but I’ve only recently begun value to how important that can be.
By the way, I was in Atlanta at the “encouragement” (!) of Melanie McGhee – and I am SO glad I came.
Thank you,
Wendy
Wendy, THRILLED you were in Atlanta. Melanie McGhee is a treasure… I’m glad she brought you! =)
Michelle – Your bedside manner point is spot-on! Each speaker is unique and resonates with different individuals in the audience. I’m not going to be dancing on the stage or leading a pep rally, but I will give you so much information your pen will be burning the page with information! I’m a get-to-the-point person, and I appreciate those who do the same in their presentations.
Enjoyed yours at Spark and Hustle. And btw, as a former homeschooling mom myself, I had to chuckle at your comment about not fitting it with that crowd. :)) Been there, done that, and the homeschooling years I spent with my children were some of the most rewarding of my life. I wouldn’t trade them for anything!
Maria, thank you! I agree… my homeschooling days were precious to me. I miss them a lot, although I know my kids are getting more of what they need in the school they now attend. Still, as you said, I wouldn’t trade those days for anything. It was me and them… them and me… all day, every day and I LOVED it! Wish we had had more time to talk in Atlanta! Let’s stay in touch !
Michele, I continue to be impressed with your writing and speaking skills. You are always direct, to the point, informative and also personal… authentic!
These are all great points and important in marketing. I’m making a copy to keep on hand.
Thanks for sharing.
Cherie
PS Your mom in is right!
Cherie, thanks! My Mom’s reading this, so she appreciates your affirmation! lol… Always great to hear from you!
Wow, as I am reading this I can truly say that I agreed with every point, especially #4. The magic of twitter someone retweeted this & I just happened to be thinking along these lines today of what’s going to make me different & not be afraid to allow my authentic self shine! Very timely & on point thank you.
You’ve officially gained a new blog stalker, as this is my first visit!!
Latrice, tell me MORE about YOU.. I’ve never had a blog stalker. =) =)
My low tolerance list for businesses include: not returning phone calls, feeding me crap when you actually don’t know just say you don’t and I’ll be more than happy to get a reference or wait for an email or call when you find out, lying about true cost, favoritism when it comes to customers (my money is as green as anyone else’s) , inflating the services offered.
I actually stopped using the services of a photographer because he didn’t reply to emails for a time sensitive service he was aware of. I had 10 people ask me about my experience with him after that well I told them the truth and recommended another person they really liked and all of them hired the other photographer.
Webly, MAN!!! I hope you never get mad at me!! lol….
I absolutely love your honesty and the fact that you make no excuses for being exactly who you are. I see why Tory and you are such good friends as well as collaborators. Thank you for being the voice of reason and for telling it like it really is. As I head into a week of business planning, I am glad to be reminded to bring my differences to the forefront and to celebrate them. I also think that just demonstrating my passion for what I do is way better than “hard sell”. Am I in the business of selling? Absolutely! But if I am authentic and passionate about what I do, the selling becomes much more natural. Thank you!
Great piece, Michelle! I sometimes question what makes me different from other coaches and your article reminded me that just by being me (bedside manner, authenticity and style) I am different from any other coach. I am passionate about my work because I know I can help people make a difference in their own lives and in the world. I do it through a balance of compassion, candor and humor. What that means is that I am a good fit for some and not for others. And that’s OK. I share many of your intolerance and would add victim mentality, righteousness and arrogance, just to name a few. Differentiation is sometimes a matter of degrees and you’ve helped me clarify and articulate my uniqueness. Thanks!